Smart People: they are sad and desperate, says major hollywood production

Alright, blaaaaaaahg, the time has come to test the parameters of this relationship. I will try to respect your boundaries of restricted emotional vomitude, and in exchange, you should try and have an increased tolerance for half-baked political anger. Let's give it a whirl.

Recently I have taken up an aggressive Pedestrians' Rights campaign here in Evanston, IL. Mostly this consists of wearing bright colors and refusing to stop before crossing the street in places where I have the clear right of way, ie any intersection without a light. Occasionally I verbally assert my displeasure at the infringement of said rights in the clearest possible terms to drivers with open windows. There have been a couple of instances of hood-and-trunk banging on cars casually drifting through crosswalks, although sadly these are only possible when I have large male escorts because yeah rights are cool but so is not getting my shit jacked up. I am thinking about ways to take this to the next level. It is (wo)man against machine here, and if we refuse to stand up for what is ours we may as well just sell our babies to the robots already. Or something.

What brings you to the internet on a fine spring night such as this? you may be asking yourself. I suppose the answer is that I am still slightly tipsy from a single drink enjoyed hours and hours ago, and thus feeling a little loquacious. Did you see Smart People? I did.* You shouldn't. Why? I can detail the reasons if you really want.

Let's put aside for the time being that it was a shapeless script without a single likable character or memorable scrap of dialogue. Let's ignore the inflammatory pot-shots it took at feminists and gay men -- those jokes are so easy! Feminists are angry and gay men are pathetic homemakers groveling for your acceptance into polite society! Let's even look past the disgusting, lingering shots of Dennis Quaid's paunch as the director's only tool to visually convey how pitiful and sad the main character is, because we all know that fat people are required to be miserable because hello they are fat, and what a sad state that must be, although the lazy fucks probably deserve it for not taking control of their stupid fat lives.

My actual Big Issues with this movie were twain: the random pregnancy-as-fulfillment subplot, and the attempted portrayal of the characters as archetypal "smart people."
1) Correct me if I'm wrong, but there seem to be a lot of pregnant chick movies out recently. And again, correct me if I'm wrong, but abortion never really seems to be a serious option in any of them. Sure, Juno had a mildly funny scene about fingernails, but mostly abortion is just a bad option a minor character has to propose so that it can be shot down and the chick can make with the gestation. All women want babies, most want to be pregnant, and all end up finding some sort of character redemption and massive fulfillment of purpose on the other end of the delivery room. We get it. Movie making has actually regressed at least 30 years in the past 2. I am really, really over it.
2) If you are smart, you are most likely aloof. You certainly lack social skills, and are probably alone. Your interests are banal, and you assume that everyone around you is less than human. Oh, and you are UTTERLY MISERABLE. I know this cultural hatred of intelligence is not new, but it certainly is scary. Why the media and entertainment industry insist on spinning this myth of unlikeable, unpersonable smart people in opposition to the fun-loving, true of heart masses of midling intelligence is beyond me. This is probably not unrelated to our failing educational system and rapidly decreasing role in science and innovation on a global scale. When our culture denigrates the desire to learn, and insists that intelligence must come hand in hand with pretension, it's not surprising that so few of us make it through higher education and that 3/4 of the people around me are assholes. Just saying.

And, we're done. Thanks for listening, old web old pal.


*I will have it noted for the record that drinking jug wine with David and seeing Sarah Jessica Parker movies was not my original plan for the evening, but my hot date bagged on me,** and I do sort of like Ellen Page.
** Columbia College, it would seem that all of your students are sort of cute but extremely flakey. Based on the two I have met. This episode of Sweeping Generalizations brought to you by Carlo Rossi.